Self Help Sanctum

fulfill your self

What is happiness and why does it seem to be so hard to achieve?

by Katrina-Jane

So many people are in the pursuit of happiness and contentment, which to me mean exactly the same thing.

What is happiness and why does it seem to be so hard to achieve?

Why do so many people seem to have to do courses and workshops trying to find what will make them happy?

Firstly, I believe that happiness has nothing to do with where you live, the kind of clothes you wear or the car that you drive, these are just things that the marketing world are constantly telling us that we need, why? Because it makes them money, that’s why.  They know that if they are constantly bombarding us with images that we will, in the end think that we need that new car because it makes us better than those that don’t have one or that latest vacuum cleaner will make things so much easier for us around the house, when in reality all it creates is us having to work harder and longer to buy things that we just don’t need.

Happiness and contentment comes from within us and only we can give it to ourselves, it means that you are happy where you are in your world that you are pleased with what you have achieved to date, that you’re happy with what you have and that if you died tomorrow you would be content with what you have achieved and who you are as a person.  There are some practical things that can make us happy and one may be helping others and by doing that we feel a happiness within us, don’t feel guilty about this, some people seem to and I don’t understand why, I mean if you are helping someone and it makes you and them feel good, then how can that be a bad thing?  But you can’t rely on just helping others to be happy, that isn’t what it’s all about.

Do realize that just because you are happy where you are at this point in time, doesn’t mean you don’t strive for personal knowledge and learning because that is growth, what you realize is if you want to get that university degree, you know that it won’t make you ‘happy’ because you are already happy it is just something that you would like to achieve but it isn’t the be all and end all of your life you are just continuing to live in contentment and accepting new challenges.  Being happy and content just means you don’t constantly strive for more and more ‘stuff’ to fill your homes and lives.  Happiness and inner peace is being able to say ‘I’m OK with my life’, but I’m willing to learn and grow but achieving accolades won’t make me any happier than I already am.

All that stuff that you are told to buy will only give you short term happiness, and then that quickly wears off and you go off and buy something else to try and make you feel happy again and then again and you get stuck in a cycle that you think I need XYZ and that will make me happy.  But that sense of inner peace and being content with your life is only something that you can achieve within yourself and this is the thing you need to remember.

Happiness is understanding and accepting our past and learning from that, it’s not allowing ourselves to blame others for our perceived unhappiness, because once you’re an adult, it’s up to you to understand who you are, what you’re needs are and then accepting that it is now up to you to change the way that you think, what you do for a living or do whatever it is that you need to do and accept whatever it is that you need to accept and let go of in order to be happy.

It’s about not being in a victim thought mentality of “why me?” it’s about thinking positively, it’s about being accepting of your faults and others and it’s about being true to yourself and who you are and knowing that you are doing the best for yourself.  It’s about not comparing yourself to others, because they are on their own journey just as you are on yours, if you constantly think that others around you are happier because they have a better job than you, then you’ll never be happy.

But in the long run, if you want to be happy, it’s up to you, it’s as simple as how you think about things and not expecting someone else or buying things to make you happy because they won’t.  It’s stopping comparing yourself to others and who they are and what they have.  You see, you have the power and the ability to be happy, right now, just as you are, you just have to step up to the plate and believe it by letting go of that attachment to things and achievements as the key to happiness otherwise you will never find it because it’s not ‘out there’ it’s completely ‘in there’.

About the Author

Katrina-Jane spent over 30 years in the Seventh-day Adventist Church – when life sent her a curve ball and she realized she was clairvoyant.  She has done readings for people all over the world and is passionate about encouraging people to be their best and to believe in themselves.  She has written two books, Christian to Clairvoyant about her own personal journey and Do you See What I See? for children, explaining to them about seeing spirits in a very simple and non-scary way, both books are available through  She is down to earth, never takes herself too seriously and has a wicked sense of humor.

For more information on Katrina-Jane, please visit

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